BLOG ABOUT FACEBOOK

Ok, here is the long-awaited blog about facebook. Sorry it took so long, but I really wanted to flesh this out and some of it needed me to cool off to do so. I thought I would be able to post right away about it, I was wrong. lol. So, to fill everyone in again...I deleted ALL of my friends from facebook. I seriously gave a 5 minute warning to most with my last status, but anyone with an A name really didn't get much of a warning at all. It took me 2+ hours to remove all of my friends and I know it was irrational and all, but it really did help and now I think I won't hate facebook as much.

Here are some of the reasons I did what I did: (THIS IS GOING TO BE REALLY LONG) and some of it will be ranty, so ignore any grammar mistakes, etc. Trying here but I just need to get this up.

1) I had 425 friends on facebook. A person can only have so many relationships going on in their life and it is not the same as the amount of friends you can have on facebook. I know people like to keep in touch and all, but how often do you REALLY talk to those people? I spent SO much time saying "I miss you" or "I wish we still hung out" than anything on facebook. I had people on there from Job Corps, High School, Middle School, and even Elementary school. I had derby girls that I never really knew (and some that I do know) I had people from Timothy Project that never talked to me when we were in Timothy Project, but after it was over, they added me on facebook and still said almost nothing. A lot of the Job corps and school friends were like that as well, I never really was friends with them before, but now that we don't see each other, we are friends? It was a messed up and convoluted and it just wasn't good for me. I felt like I had to maintain all of those friendships and it caused me to neglect other friendships....it was just not good all around.

2) I was getting tired of all of the rendom crap I was seeing. I still don't think facebook is a political platform. Mostly because people think that just because it is the internet and they aren't saying it to your face, that now they can be as rude as they want without reprimand. I'm totally fine if people post links to political pictures, comics, or articles...even political websites...but when someone posts random political comments as their facebook status update, it gets annoying. The BIGGEST reason for this is that mosts people update their status out of random passion and without thinking. They do no research and start stupid debates and argue them as if they know what they are talking about. Okay, people...we can tell when you don't know what you are talking about...just because you also have idiot troll friends who debate with you and don't know you are an idiot does not mean you are NOT an idiot. I love healthy debates...debates where both sides are in the know about the topics they are talking about or are at least able to somehow find the right information. Healthy debates include people that might get fired up but won't make personal digs, or take things personally themselves. Debates are supposed to he helpful, not hurtful. I know, I'm part of the 2.45% of the population that thinks this can be possible, but debates don't have to be hurtful or demeaning, they can be fun, informational and such. Sometimes we ae just ignorant and a debate helps us see things in a different light. Ok, I'm gonna stop this portion of the rant and just say that I still don't think facebook status updates are not the place to voice your political/religious debate. People don't have to agree with me. This topic was what was going through my head when I deleted all of my friends from facebook. I had posted a status saying something along those lines, that facebook is not your political platform. And that is my opinion, I am FULLY FREE to think that. Instead of people agreeing or disagreeing they told me that I have no right to infringe on people's freedom of speech, and I am a horrible person because I don't think people should do that, and that if I don't want to read it then don't read it. As if it is that easy. Facebook doesn't allow ou to block posts anymore and if it does, I don't know how to do it. I know how to block posts from pages and groups, but not people. So I was justs saying that I was thinking of just taking people off of my friends list and people said "yeah you should, stop being a jerk" or "yeah you should, we don't want you anyway." I got so much angry hate from people that I was in tears...my FRIENDS were saying these things to me. But of course they didn't have the guts to say it in public, they have to say it in a text or in a way it can't be traced to them publically. So I took everyone off of my facbook friends and decided I'd figure out what to do next once I cooled off (you can replace politics with religion too and the same rant stands) One last thing I'll add to this novel of a topic...IT IS OK TO HAVE YOUR OWN OPINIONS AND IDEAS, IT IS NOT OK FOR YOU TO HATE ON OTHERS BECAUSE OF THEIRS, I DON'T CARE HOW DIFFERENT OR OUTLANDISH YOU MIGHT SEE IT...HURTING PEOPLE IS WRONG!!!!!

If you are still reading at this point, here are some more reasons I was frustrated with facebook...

3) Privacy and Safety settings...I have been trying to figure out how I can maintain the privacy on facebook. You idiots who say "if you want to keep it private, don't put it on the internet" you people are, well, idiots. I have worked with homeless youth and I'm not supposed to have my facebook stsuff private. It leaves the door open for the youth to misunderstand the relationship you have with them. Some youth I will have on my facebook page, but some I can't for boundary reasons. Now, I'm not going to stop sharing stuff with people because someone might not be able to see it...but facebook used to allow you to keep your stuff private. You could say "friends only" and only your friends would be able to see your stuff. I know how to check the privacy settings and set them. With the most recent update, now if your friend likes or posts on something, THEIR friends can also see it and comment on it, etc. Now you can ask your friends to change THEIR settings, but most won't do it or don't know how to do it properly. Either way, I aquired two stalkers which were old clients and I had a lot of people that they were tied to. So now I have to be even MORE selective of who I add as a friend because private on facebook isn't really private.

4)Miscommunications. I try not to post stuff that could be read wrong unless I'm joking about something. Somehow someone still gets so offended. Or I'll post something and someone will think I'm lesbian. Something completely crazy like that. I've lost friends over stupid stuff like a tongue ring. I was getting really tired of it. I have facebook so I can update a lot of people at once and I also like the sharing aspects. I don't use it to be a rebel or post mean stuff to or about people. People need to stop taking things so freaking personal.

5) Jealousy. I dislike stupid jealousy. When people see posts about me hanging out with someone else and I get messages saying, "You always hang out with so-and-so but you never hang out with meeee." I hate this. It makes me not want to share details about fun times had with friends. What makes me even more upset is the people that complain are the ones that have cars and are fully capable of coming to see me too and don't. These people have no room to whine. I try to hang out with people whenever I can and if I try to hang out with people and they either can't don't have time, don't have gas, or any other random bs excuse, then I'll hang out with the same person I hung out with the day before if they are free. I don't want to hear it. It's to the point that I don't ask people anymore because I'm tired of the excuses. I have no problem if you don't want to hang out even if the reson is "I just don't feel like it tonight", but don't complain to me about never hanging out if you are the one making the excuses. And don't make me feel bad for hanging out with the friends that DO want to hang out with me. Your fake desire to hang out with me does not make me think you love me more, it just pisses me off. 

There is probably stuff that I am missing...but for now those are what came up on the top of my head. If I want to add more, I'll do a facebook blog post part 2. Basically, I like using facebook to update people on how I'm doing. I don't always have time to call or text everyone so it is nice to be able to voice my frustrations, random updates and stuff that I think people might want to know. I like to share pictures and funny things and I like the event planning thing because it can be useful at times. I could deal without the random BS.

When I took all my friends off I was thinking I would stop using facebook for a month or so. I thought it would take me that long to figure out how to block things and get my settings where I want them. It took me less time than that. I cleared out all the groups I don't use. I blocked all the page updates that pop up when you like something. I deleted the random member groups I don't use and then started slowly adding people back. I'm not going through and adding as many people as I can think of. I'm adding people as they come up and going from there.

Let's see how this goes. FB round 2. and GO!