Jesus Freak

"What will people think
When they hear that I'm a Jesus freak
What will people do when they find that it's true
I don't really care if they label me a Jesus freak
There ain't no disguising the truth

People say I'm strange, does it make me a stranger
That my best friend was born in a manger"

I heard this song today and it made me smile. I haven't heard it in forever and it just suits me.

I won't hide my Christianity, I get ridiculed for it daily. People assume that they know what "all" Christians are like and I'm to the point that I don't get drawn into a verbal match anymore. I will show what a true Christian is through my actions. I do not outwardly judge, I do not chastise, it is not my place to do so. I can offer my hand to help people where I can, I can give advice to people when asked, I can be a good person. I can only control what my actions are, and if someone is so closed off to the point that hearing what I am makes them turn away, I hope one day they open themselves up and see what the difference is between how they view Christians and how true Christians really are. I'm a Jesus Freak, my best friend was born in a manger, what about you?

Amazing Weekend, followed by Blarg!

I have a bunch to catch up on, I've been slacking at this whole thing. Job hunting sucks and it has been biting me in the butt so hard. I've applied for 10-15 jobs every week since I've moved and I had 2 interviews last week. They both said they'd get back to me by Friday, one got back to me and told me no, the other one hasn't even had the decency to call yet. I still sent my normal "thank you" card that I send after each interview, but I just want a job!!! I hate people buying stuff for me, it's nice and all, but I don't like to be a mooch. I won't ask people for things unless I REALLY need them. Something I have learned is that as much as I hate asking for help, I need to allow people to help me when offered. So from here on out, if people offer me things, they'd better mean it. I'm tired of worrying that people are only offering to be nice but don't really want to help. If you offer me something and I take it, don't resent me for it later or ask me to pay you back unless the condition of the help is if I pay you back. I don't like racking up tabs, but sometimes a girl's gotta eat.

Aside from that...This weekend I spent staying at Thetford Lodge for a letterboxing event. (if you want information on letterboxing, go to atlasquest.com) I love letterboxing and meeting people that letterbox. We did some letterboxing in Salem on the way to Lyons, then we did night boxing in John Neal Memorial Park. I'd never done night boxing before and it was amazing. We found all the boxes and I got first finder on two of them. The bullfrogs were seriously out that night. They played music for us the whole night as we hiked around the park. WE got to see one of them and he was huge, I swear I could compare him to a gallon jug! =]

Saturday we went to Canyon Creek, Bear Creek, North Fork Nature Park, and back to John Neal. It rained on us pretty much all day, but we took a break halfway through for a lunch and hot chocolate  break back at the lodge. (hot chocolate with marshmallows is amazing) On our second trip out we also stopped for hot chocolate with whipped cream =] The hikes were beautiful. at Bear Creek there were a lot of uphill and downhill slopes. I avoided a couple for safety on my own part, but it was amazingly beautiful. North Fork Nature Park was also beautiful. I got a little scared as the trail got close to the edge and it was basically roots holding us up, but it was worth the scare. We found all the event boxes and bonus boxes, and it was probably the best event I'd been to aside from the Powell's event. (even with the rain)

Today we tried to find more boxes in salem, but were unsuccessful...maybe in the summer we will go back. I have fun boxing with KuKu and QBF and I can't wait for the event next weekend.

Back to job stuffs.....the Blarg! is related to my coming home and applying for 5 jobs. I REALLY want a job. Oh and I want to murder some children in my apartment complex, but that's besides the point.

studying up on personal travellers so I can be ready for next weekend =]

More of My Update-y Stuffs

The rest of these topics have no real genre except general life I guess...

So my car has been giving me troubles. I just want to get it all fixed and taken care of. Today it turned back on, but it hasn't turned on for a week. It is so frustrating sometimes. I don't have the money to pay for car repairs right now. I just hope my car lasts long enough for me to get the money to help it. Right now it has gas in it and I'm going to use it to do more job search and such. I am glad I can drive now =] I feel so comfortable driving, I actually enjoy it.

On another note, my mom has been doing this diet plan and she has really inspired me. I know that I cannot afford to do the same program she is doing (I can't even afford the much cheaper Weight Watchers) so my weight loss is going to have to be all me and my willpower. I need to work on this. Slowly I have been working on my eating habits. At least right now I am eating on more of a regular schedule which is really good for my body. I REALLY want to lose weight...for nobody but myself. I want to feel confident in my looks. So my mom has been sending emails documenting her path. In one of her emails she had some goal setting questions so I am stealing those and answering them here for myself. Setting attainable and realistic goals for myself.

1.        What are your health goals?

a. I will pick 1 recipe a week from my Weight Watchers cook book and make it instead of a normal meal.
b. I will do 15 minutes of exercise 3 days a week.
c. I will continue to plan my meals and stick to them.

2.        What are your career goals?

Find a job. I'm not going to put a time limit on this. I just need to find a job.

3.        What are your financial goals?

a. Start the Dave Ramsey program once I get my first paycheck from said new job.

b. Pay off all old debts by December of 2013

4.        What are your education goals?


a. pay off PSU by August so I can register for Fall term
b. Graduate with Bachelor's by June 2014

5.        What are your home environmental goals?

a. Organize my room by the end of June.
b. Get a bed by mid July

c. Make my house into a home.

6.        What are your relationship goals?

a. Spend the rest of 2011 evaluating my relationships and figuring out which ones I want to invest more time into.

b. Continue doing board gaming group for social interaction.

So I will work on those goals. I want to be a healthier me. I want to get my life in order and I'm taking the right steps to move gracefully in that direction.

 This picture of me, taken on Saturday, is the best picture I've had of myself in a while. Thought it is constructed well and such, I know it is deceptive in some areas. I know which of those areas it is deceptive in and I want to improve them. I am not saying this is an edited picture, it is not edited at all, but still, deceptive.

If you want my advice, let that freak flag fly.

All things geeky related are going to flow forward in this post.

I think I have mentioned that I found a board gaming group and I love it. In just two weeks I've played so many new games and I'm catching on quick. It is a social circle that is healthy for me and I'm having a ton of fun. I already have a few new friends here and I like hanging out with them. Tonight we might be playing a cooperative Lord of the Rings game. I am glad we are gaming tonight since I don't think I'll be able to go this Friday or Saturday.

Sara is reading the Harry Potter series and we are watching the movies as well. I am excited that I actually think she can finish catching up by July 15th so we can go to the midnight premiere together. This is the last Harry Potter movie and I'm so excited. I just finished re-reading the seventh book again. Watching the movies with Sara has made me want to re-read the whole series again for sort of a refresher. I'll be starting book 1 again tomorrow.

This might not be geeky per say, but so what? =] We had the best storm in a long time on Sunday. It was hot and beautiful all day and then a torrential downpour came. If my time of the month hadn't started, I would have been jumping around in the rain. The thunder clouds excited me and we even saw and hear lightning. It was epic. I LOVE storms sooooo much!!!

Ze Stuff Relating to Church

Ok....in my further attempt to categorize these clusters of posts here encompasses all things current with all things church and church friends related.

Sara and I are deciding what church to go to. Right now  we are trying out Calvary Chapel Worship Center in Hillsboro. So far I like it. They seem to have a lot of the same church values that I like. The pastor has a great sense of humor. They print out a sermon summary so it is really easy for me to follow along during church. They have a welcome packet for all new members (though I could have lived without being pointed out in front of the church on my first day). The leader in charge of the college group contacted us within 24 hours and the pastor sent us a letter welcoming us to the church. It was all REALLY welcoming. Tomorrow/Today Sara will go to their Wednesday service and this Friday we will go to their young adult study.

I feel bad lately though. I know that Sara wants to jump in and be uber active in a church, and I love that. The only thing is, I don't think I can just jump from occasionally going to church once a week to going to church 3 times a week. I suggest going to Wednesday and Friday service because I feel like it is what I should be doing and I know that church is good for you and all, but if I feel an obligation to do it instead of a desire to do it, I won't like going and I don't ever want to get to that point. I slipped a lot in the past year and I don't like it, but it takes more than a few weeks to change a lifestyle habit. I have my aspirations for this area, I want to get hooked into a group study that will become long term, one that I can build relationships in, but it will take time. I just want to start right now by going to Sunday services regularly, find a church I like and then take steps upward from there. Does that make me horrible? I don't think so.

In other news, I get to see my TP girls this weekend for Floopday. I'm stoked and will be glad to hang out with them. Since the TP study ended I was still worried that me moving away would prevent me from seeing them, even though we talked about this, but I am regaining hope =]

Let's Take A Walk Into The Past

Ok, these two topics I'd like to blog about in one post together....encompassing the past. School years and Job Corps.

I have been running into a ton of people from my middle and high school days. At first I was bitter. I could easily hate a lot of these people for how I was treated by them in school. They may feel no remorse or even think they did anything wrong, but it would inevitably be my choice of what to do. Facebook, such a great place for that. A simple way for me to test the waters. I mean, I know that the likelihood of me becoming super close friends with these people is slim to none, but at least some of them could become friends instead of begrudged enemies. So I took the plunge...when I saw a familiar name on the "People you might know.." side of facebook, I'd think for a moment...wonder if I actually want to say hi to this person, and then if I did then I would click "add as friend" If they added me back, then I'd see where it would go.

I have forgiven all of the people from my school years. Maybe not to their faces, but that is not the point. In church I get told to forgive not once, not twice but seventy times seven times. I may not forget what happened in high school, but I have freed myself from carrying the burdens of what others thought of me. I feel secure in who I am and I wont let a single person change that in me. One specific person gave me hope on this matter. I don't know if she will read this, but Stephanie Bethel, if you do read this, I want to say thank you. I don't know if you realized how much it meant, but when you told me that you never hated me in school, it gave me hope for others. I may not have seen you since high school, but the fact that you take time to comment on things going on in my life is wonderful, and I greatly appreciate it. Your words helped me cross a bridge that took me years to face.

Next I'll bring up Job Corps. Those eleven months out of my life were so short yet held so much of my life. I met a lot of people, but I was in a very insecure part of my life. Friends that I could have been much closer to slipped away because of my attitude about life. i realize that now, but I am grateful for those that stuck with me, didn't chastise me or leave me. Again this has been a door that facebook has helped to keep open. Lately I have been looking back at my time at Job Corps and I miss it. I wouldn't go back to the rules again, I like my freedom, but I miss the things I learned there, I miss the people and the adventures.

I had Amy and Kasia there with me. They were my strength to stand up for myself. We had Bible studies together, wrote stories together, and had many geeky moments together. I could share anything with these girls, and still could if I saw them again. I miss them dearly. Our friendship truly lasts the test of time, we don't see each other often, but that doesn't matter. What does matter is how much we still matter to each other. I will soon take a road trip to see Kasia and hopefully Amy as well. Aisak, Furby, and Skittles together again at last.

Mariona has been another friend to last the test of time. Now we are in close proximity to each other and are hanging out again. I really treasure her friendship and cant wait to see where our Heavenly Father takes us upon the path He has set out before us. I think we will have a ton of fun together, having fun adventures and great stories to tell =]

As I add more friends on facebook from Job Corps, I get reminded of all the great memories I have. The holiday with Shawn and his sisters, mud wrestling and almost getting kicked out for it, duct taping my roommate, fat kid parties, watching the Green Mile and RENT a bazillion times....it was all fun, and I'll never forget it. The lessons I learned there are still coming back to teach me.

There are more people I could mention here, but I don't want to make this into another novel.

I'll part with a picture. One thing I miss from Job Corps is the sunset I would get to see....The coast had such beautiful sunsets.

To Fill In Some Blanks

Okay, I have a lot to post. I am going to break it up into various posts and if those reading my blog make it through my novels, I commend your perseverance. This post will serve to fill in some blanks on some of the more general stuff.

Settling into the apartment has been a step by step process so far. Slowly Sara and I have been chipping away at the various tasks we set before ourselves while doing other things as well. Sara had been working on her final college assignment and I was working on my schoolwork. Sara is now done and my term is over as well. Now she has set along to work on her novel and go through her Brit trip pictures while also job searching. I am doing job searching, planning for NaNoWriMo this coming year and trying to get my life into order. So, yeah, in between all of this...making our apartment home has been a long art project.

I like some of the small habits we have gotten into already. Her sister Heidi gave her/us a magnetic calendar with a separate weekly planner. We are using the monthly calender to generalize our plans so we might know what the other is up to. The weekly planner we are using for meal plans. Meal planning has not been a thing I've ever done in a living situation. I really quite like it. It was something I admired that Niel and Julie did at their house, and so easily it is a habit we form in our new place together. This situation keeps proving to have been formed for us by a great and loving father. =]

I have been feeling under the weather for a while now. I think the stress I've put my body under is finally catching up to me. I like to do more than my body can take and then I pay for it later. So my room is going to have to stay a pit for now. The rest of the apartment is coming together though. Our kitchen is pretty well stocked with food and kitchen wares. As a cook I'm glad of this. Next goal, teach Sara how to cook. =] We are thinking of themes for decorations. Our walls will definitely be unique. We are going to decorate our living room with travel themed pictures and posters. Our dining room with pirate themed decorations. Our hallway will house pictures of our family members, Our office with music and literature references and our bedrooms will house the rest of our decorations. No place will rival our awesome decorations. We want to paint our dining room table with a compass rose and somehow find a way to paint the chairs to fit in =]

Now, if you have made it this far...here is a question for you. I'll begin with an explanation first. Sara and I want to have a house-warming party. We do not expect gifts from anyone, but we also know that some people will want to get us gifts. Is it tacky to ask for gift cards instead of gifts? We want to do this because we already have a lot of the necessities to start a household. Right now we are saving up to get me a bed and then get bookshelves for our "library." We would like to ask for gift cards to Ikea and Target, but are unsure of how tacky that would be. Opinions? Please be honest. =]

thanks for reading, and now onto my next post =]